Media Identity Formation

After viewing the the third episode of the television series Lost, I asked my wife a few questions about her experience. My wife does not usually get into television shows, so her connection with Lost is a rather rare occurence. After the interview, I believe I undertand her connection a little better. Viewing Lost creates a sort of pseudo-community for her (and me, I guess) by becoming a sort of ritual in our lives.
First, I observed my wife as she watched Lost. The first thing I noticed was that when more stressful events occured, she would pull closer to me. This tendency leads me to think that she feels a very real connection with these people, as though they were real people who are possibly friends or at least acquantances. I cannot imagine feeling that way without having some sort of relationship with the characters. The other tendency I noticed was that my wife sat still. This is actually a very rare occurence: she is usually running around, very energenic. She usually likes to be doing something else while watching TV, folding laundery or paper work, etc. But with Lost she is completely involved in the show.
These behaviors led me to think about what Lost has been for us the last couple of years. Lost became a ritual for us during her second year at graduate school. It was one time we set aside to with with us and not do anything else. It was one of those shows we both connected with, which is actually somewhat rare. I believe this tradition is a big part of her viewing experience, making it much more comforting and communal than other shows for her.
I asked my wife several questions about her experience watching Lost. What I gleaned from her answers led me to conclude that Lost is a ritualistic escape into a ready-made community. She said that it allowed her to relax and forget about the stresses of work for a while. I found this curious since Lost is not exactly a stress-free kind of show--people marooned on a desert island with enemies every. After I suggested the degree of tension in Lost didn't seem relaxing, my wife said that the stress in Lost was both very serious and yet completely fake. I think what she meant was that although the characters were trying to survive, they were just characters, which let my wife examine her own stresses (which become less important when faced with life and death choices in Lost) and yet feel completely safe and calm.
Another element of the experience my wife mentioned was the connection with the characters on Lost. She felt honest feelings for some of them, whether good or bad. She really liked some and wanted them to survive and flourish. Others she disliked or did not trust, adding to the complexity of her experience. I think her connection with the characters is a large part of her experience. They are not her friends by any means, but she does worry about them. I think that is simply a part of good storytelling. Any time one can create honest characters, whether in print or film, it is easy to feel connected with them. It may be a part of human nature to connect with the stories of others.
Through my observations and interview questions, I feel my wife derives a sense of community out of her Lost experience. The ritual-like viewing she and I share allows the show to become part of us. Her connection with the characters allows her to feel honest feelings. At the same time, however, Lost provides her with an escape from her life stresses. That may be what good stories are meant to do.